Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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Why did the boy lick the window? He had Down's syndrome

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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alert("Hello");

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Once upon a time, there was a boy. He was 12 years old. He is dad was rich from his business and so when it came time for his 12 year old boy to turn 13 he insisted on buying the boy whatever he wanted. He thought that the imagination of a 12 year old boy might in fact humour him, even if the cost of such a present reached the millions. He asked his son "Son, a very special day's coming up", his son smirked "I know Dad". "Well, what would you like?" asked the Dad. His son pondered for several seconds before replying, "honestly Dad, all I want it 12 Pink Ping Pong balls". The Dad, curious and a little disappointed asked "of course son, but why?". His son replied "I can;t say, I'd just like them for my birthday please". And so on his thirteenth birthday, he indeed received 12 Pink Ping Pong balls. His Dad thought nothing of it until next year, when he asked his son "what would you like for your birthday this year son? A new 82-inch Tv for you toilet, or how about a new jet?". His soon blew the hair out of his eyes and said, "Dad, all I want is room full of Pink Ping Pong balls". His dad again agreed but asked "why Pink Ping Pong balls son?". His son replied "I'll tell you when I get them". True to his word when the boy turned 14, he received a whole room full of Pink Ping Pong balls and his Dad asked him "now why did you want them son". But his son replied "I'll tell you next year". Rather reluctantly his Dad agreed. and then he died.

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Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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