My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

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Women's rights

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farm was sold and he had no other place to go.

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

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Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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"Almost as accidental as your spelling I'm afraid." -...

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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