What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

What did Robin do in between crime fighting? He had a paper route.

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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