Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

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I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops