You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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Who is it?

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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How do Asians name their children? They throw them down the stairs and see what sound they make.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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all these jokes are horrible now

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Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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