trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Why didn't the black man go to work? He had to attend his sister's funeral, who just recently passed away after her long hard battle with breast cancer.

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a mother: my little boy always asks me to take him to see dinosaurs...but they are extinct. me: take him to a museum you dumb bitch!

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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what would your nan do if she was alive right now? scratching the top of the coffin.

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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Penis

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

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What is better than a Beer? Two Beers.

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Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

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Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

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What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

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What's an AntiJoke? A joke that has no comical value.

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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