What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

I have an idea! You leave.

jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

How do you stop your baby crawling in circles? Pick it up and smother it.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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