One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

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Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

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How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

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ewrg

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What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops