Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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