What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

What is square and grey? A grey square.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

So a baby seal walks into a club...

What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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