Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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Whats white and sticky? Marshmellows

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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Did you know that many scientists will find out what happens after death within your lifetime? But not their lifetime...

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Why is a four year olds bedroom the hottest place in Texas? Its on fire, like the rest of the state because of a tragic wildfire thats ruining the lives of many people.

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Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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Is there anything better than pussy? Ya a really nice book

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's Black

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PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

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What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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