A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what will you have". The man says "Friendship" and bursts out crying. At this point he is making a scene and security will have too be called.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the priest go to jail? He had sexual relations with young boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Laura Pratz... not having a strong urge to tweet everything that happens in her life.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the priest take a little boy into the back room? To talk about the boy's future.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -15

your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the man say to the orphan? No one loves you, you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A gay man walks down a street before being stabbed to death by a homophobe.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why can't black people be in a talent show? Because they'll steal the show.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops