What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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Niggas be like you ugly and you playing hard to get, yo ass already hard to want!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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Q :Whats the difference between a truck load of bowling balls and a truck load of dead babies? A: I don't have a truck of bowling balls.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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I am quite mature.

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops