Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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What's the worst part of being a black Jew? That is a very uncommon combination of race and religion, therefore causing obvious confusion.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

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I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

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Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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A man walks into a bar he orders a drink

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What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

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Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

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Why is Blake dumb? He was in algebra one as a freshman. And his nickname is angry Blake

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What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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