What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen property that you should return immediately because the consequences of shop-lifting can prevent you from getting a good job and might land you in prison.

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who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

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How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

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Japan

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Why did the little boy fall out the window? A child molester pushed him.

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What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

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Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

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When's the best time to kill a black man? Never. Committing murder is a felony and constitutes as highly immoral.

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

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cancer

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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I just got robbed by an invisible man!!!!

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Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

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What's the difference between a black man and a couch? One is a human being and one is a piece of furniture.

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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What's worse than being a midget Being a midget with no legs

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why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple You thought I was going to steal an anti-joke didnt you squidward

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What did Shaq do when he first met Rondo? Play Basketball

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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