- Anti Joke

Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What did the man say to the woman before he had sex with her? "May I have sex with you, please?"

women's rights.

Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

They see me rollin' They hatin' Patrolin they try to catch write a joke Try to catch me write a joke Try to catch me write a joke (tootle loo, I see you ;)

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

A blonde goes to school, and completes a difficult math problem.

-You know what will always get people fighting? -Hey, you wanna fight?

So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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