Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Whats brown and can't ride a bike? A lampshade.

Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

a black man did not eat chicken.

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

What do you call a shoe with milk in it? Shoe

knock knock? come in

Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

Granny porn!

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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