- Anti Joke

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

there's a bus full of black people what do you call the white bus driver? coach.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

why couldn't the girl sit down? she didn't have a butt.

Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome