what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

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How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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taking out the trash... at night

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not?

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

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How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

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A woman went for a midnight jog. She's been missing for 12 years now.

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Whats fat and gay joe diragi

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Q: How pregnancy test is performed in Somalia?! A: Shove a piece of bread between the legs of the women and if the bread is bitten when you take it out, she is pregnant!

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

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I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

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a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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