Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Did you hear the one about the Mexican that went to college? All his life, Juan wanted to get a decent education, but was unable to due to his family's low income. So Juan worked hard all his life, and got a part-time job. He made a little cash here, a little there. He also studied vigorously, getting a 33 on his ACT. All that work eventually paid off, and Juan was eventually accepted at Princeton University. Juan is now a highly paid Neurological surgeon, and has saved countless lives

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has parkinsons and therefore couldn't keep his hand steady.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man is pulled over because he is suspected of drunk driving. The officer comes to the window and is greeted by a man who then replies: What seems to be the officer, problem?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's red and has wheels? A red car

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who's Juan? DIS ONE

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

OMG did you hear about the man who sky-dived from mars?!!!! No…. Me neither

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down -10

teacher: say ur alphabet kid: abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwuxyz kid:wheres the pee teacher:half way down my leg

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Anakin tell Luke he was his father? Because honest people never lie

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What can a pizza do that a Jew can't? Pizzas can't do anything, so the answers are infinite.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A:Knock Knock B:It's open

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops