There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

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Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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