Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A: mudslide

thumb_up thumb_down -5

sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did I the granda fall out of her wheel chair?. She fell down the steps

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I have three heads and nine eyes, what am I? I'm a liar.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats black, blue, and red all over? A man who has just been severally beaten.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yellow People !!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I hate weddings! Old people always poke u and say "ur next" so I've decided to do the same to them... At Funerals

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops