Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

How old are you? 7

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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