There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

yo mama's so dumb, she had to retake the 11th grade.

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

Knock Knock Who's there May I come in? May I come in who? . . .What's wrong with you can I come in or not?

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

Cancer. Super Cancer.

Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

You know whats funny? A man cooking dinner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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