What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

what looks like a bug, lives in larch mount and lives in a mansion? Aodhan Hearty, lied about the mansion... he lives in a web with his buggy family

what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

Justin beiber comment if u get it

Hey Shea

What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

The continent of Africa is mired in corruption, poverty, food crises, disease, and the exploitation of its resources. Happy Kwanzaa

Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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