What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

What's worse than AIDS Nothing can possibly be worse than finding out you have AIDS

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

How do you name a beast who eat rocks and fly. rock-eater flying beast

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

No soup for you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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