What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

A black man, a Mexican man, a white man, an Asian man, a priest, a rabbi, and a prostitute walk into a bar. It was a very popular bar.

What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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