Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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A bunch of nuns were riding a three-seat bicycle. The seats were comfy and no one complained.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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What's a bench painted red white and blue all over? An American BENCH.

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Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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This is an anti- joke

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There was an english man, and irishman and an pakistani sitting in a bar. What a wonderful example of racial & cultural differences bing put to one side while they are socialising in a friendly environment.

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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Roses are flowers.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Q: Why do police men keep killing unarmed black men? A: I don't know.

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What did the angry asian man do after he crashed his car? He died of serious head trauma and internal bleeding.

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How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

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What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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