What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

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If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: It didn't do it for any good reason,chickens are mindless and do random things,like crossing the road

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Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops