Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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Why didn't he finish his

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What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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Please ignore this statement.

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What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

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"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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