Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

knock knock whos there? yo mama yo mama who? yo mamas mama!!

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

Arab 1: Du good bai me, and I'll du good bai you. Arab 2: Ye men, sounds good men. Arab 3: O man, no way. Arab 4: K, u wait...jus wait n see.. Arab 5: I no interest! Me so saudi! Arab 6: D'oh...ha, ha, haa! Arab 7: This is so bahrain...I'm going to go club some protesters.

Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

Do you want to hear a racist joke? I hate black people...

A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

how many black people are... wait stereotypical jokes are for fags

What's worse than a bad joke? A joke that end's mid sente--

Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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