how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

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What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

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one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

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Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

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So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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What did the boy get at the bowling alley for his birthday? a corpse. *from Bones

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What happened to the chicken that crossed the road? It got ran over by a car!

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dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

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if got a joke if fogot it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops