What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

what did the orange say to the apple? hi

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god."

thumb_up thumb_down -34

You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

thumb_up thumb_down -34

a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Are you okay? Here, let me take you to the hospital." The woman is now healing nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How did Doris respond to Uncle Monty's innapropriate chewing of her nose, ears and eyelids? She cut his head off, placed it an a saucepan, boiled and seasoned it, and then sold it to the middle east. The middle east were very grateful, and sent Doris a camel's penis as a thankyou gift.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Two Black Males walk into a bar. A white old lady leaves cautiously. Everyone else stays and has a great time with them as they are actually two very good guys, and funny too.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's black and crunchy? CO-Co PUFFS

thumb_up thumb_down -36

It's likely that very few people will read this.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops