Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

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A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Wenn Sie dies zu übersetzen, dann ist dein ein Esel

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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"Hey have you seen Stevie wonders car. Neither has he.

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops