Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

What did the guy say when he died? nothing, he was dead

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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