Committing Suicide #YOLO

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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I used to know what alzheimers was

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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Please don't shoot me

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

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Question: why did the pilot crash the plane? Answer: because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops