How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

What's white and black? Color blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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