What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications/programs, thus causing the game Jetman on Facebook to lag.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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\ \ \\ \\ >\/ 7 _.-(6' \ (=__._/` \ ) \ | / / | / > / j < _\ _.-' : ``. \ r=._\ `. \ > ,.-' >.'

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"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

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How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

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What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

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What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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How do you call a gay that is playing poker with friends You say "call" and place the right amount of fiches on the table, at that moment you are still in the race to win the pot.

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Every 5 seconds a child dies in Somalia. Good news is there are 4 second intervals when a child isn't dying in Somalia. I say kill them all

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Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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I'm not one to tell gay jokes So I won't

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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