You're so retarded that people make fun of you and you laugh with them because you don't understand and just want some friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

thumb_up thumb_down -50

If Billy has 4 apples in his left hand and 6 apples in his right hand, what does he have? Very large hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

thumb_up thumb_down +41

a man was shot.... he died

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops