What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

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What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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who has a vagina, likes men , soundslike afive year old girl, has some sweet boobies and onlyhas one hair on his little vag? Robert sweeny

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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Knock knock. Who's there. Suidi Arabia. Suida Arabia who? Huh? I was too busy loading my weaponry

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Like to tell patrick porcupine to stop gaming

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Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

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Q: How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One

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Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

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So a guy walks in to a bar.... and orders a beer.

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

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Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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