- Anti Joke

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

Yo momma is so fat that she is overweight

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

My peni s

Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

You bumder!

h

What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

Gretta has five legs? -no

Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

Feminism

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

Yo momma is so fat that she is overweight

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??