What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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Q: What's green and goes through walls? A: A pickle, you just have to throw it really hard.

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How did Jimmy get hit by the car? He dropped his Ice cream cone.

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How you know when dislextic

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? we will never know he never opened it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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Q: What's very loud, has 60 wheels, and is covered in snow? A: A massive car pile up in January that was caused by a women being distracted while Texting. 7 people were killed.

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What happened when the boy got sad He fell in a woodchipper

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Q: Why do police men keep killing unarmed black men? A: I don't know.

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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They say Jesus Christ walked on water and that humans are made up of 70% water...... So if I walk on babies, am I 70% Jesus?

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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