How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

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How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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why wouldnt you come to the dark side? i spit in the cookies

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Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

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Why do depressed people like sharp knives? Cause there good for cutting Salad

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Why did the stereo break? Cause little Johnny threw a bat at it.

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~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

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Good job, son.

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Robin get in the batmobile!

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What do you call a black police officer? The drug dealer's inside man.

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Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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why did the boys run from Michael Jackson? because they thought he was a ghost

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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What did the old man get for Christmas? He forgot because he has alzheimer's

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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