Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

You're welcome. On to the next house.

what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

What did the blonde say when she saw a box of cheerios? "Lovely, I think I'll have some of these for breakfast today. The wholegrain will be good for me."

What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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