I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

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People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

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Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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- what do u call a dead black person a problem - what do u call a lot of dead black people a big problem - what do you call a mass killing of all black people. genocide

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? I raped your mom and she swallowed my load, k

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

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Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

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what did the guy say on friday ? ah man im so glad its not monday tuesday wednesday thursday friday saturday sunday he then threw a horse at a plane while moonwalking on a star that was riding a duck that was on a rabbit. Sir jumpalot was working overtime as he had to pay for a free phone

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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