Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

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My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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whats white and if it fell from a tree it would kill you ? Pat Butcher

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How come grilled cheese?

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Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

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why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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