How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

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Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

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Beka has AIDS

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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Why did the black guy get hit by a train? I strapped him to the tracks

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Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

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Q:Why did the Grape divorce the Prune? A:Because he was tired of Rasin kids! :D

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Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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