What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was an avocado

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

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What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

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the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

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Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

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Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? To End His Suffering On The Farm. Suicidal Mission.... Complete

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The Ohio State Buckeyes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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