A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

Sam Hengal.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

Knock knock whos there? Jake jake who? jake from state farm, and i'd like to tell you about our insurance company

What did the boy say when be landed in the bottom of the well, nothing he was dead.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

why girl die cancer

How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

Your momma's so fat, she's at risk of a number of cardio-vascular problems, including high blood pressure, leading to heart disease, stroke, type II diabetes, and a premature death. She also has an elevated risk of contracting cancer.

-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

What did the raisin say to the toaster? Nothing. The raisin lacks a central nervous system, and the toaster is an inanimate object.

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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