Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

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A boy walks home from school. On his way home some bullies stole his kite. When the boy got home he was greeted by a police officer that told him that his parents had been killed. The boy started crying and the Police officer said " whats wrong?". The boy replied " some bullies stole my kite".

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A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

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why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

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A midget goes up to a prostitute and asks "what’s the worst joke you ever heard?" She replies "probably this one

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What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

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What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

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Chuck Norris got hit by a train. It was a very bloody and sad incident and he will be missed.

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Your sex life.

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two peanuts were walking down the street. but one was unsalted...

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

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A small child walks past a man on the street: Fortunately, as the man hates children he is perfect height to let a massive fart rip in his face on the way past. His mum looks disgusted. They carry on with their day.

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What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

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Why didn't the Mexican kid go to school? Because he was sick.

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

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You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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