A bear walks into a bar..... The bartender asks " what do you want?" , he gets killed by the bear because he started talking to it Made by eli

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a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Today I went to the grocery store. I purchased milk, eggs, orange juice, and my favorite breakfast cereal for $18.73. I subsequently got into my sedan and drove home.

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What did Lois say to Peter? Who cares... Family Guy is a stupid show.

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An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

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A dead guy walks into a grave.

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Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

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WILLY

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Obese penguin. It died of a heart attack.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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Stop making 9/11 jokes their just plane unfunny

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

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women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

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why did the black man go to jail why he raped your mom

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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